Stuff I Said This Week

Sometimes I sound like a broken record.  And sometimes I like to shake it up a bit.  Y’know, keep ‘em on their runner clad toes.  Keeps it interesting. 

I’ve heard it said that if you hear the same order/instruction all of the time, you tune out.  I know this is true.    

On an average week I say stop! only about eleventy billion times.  Ok, strictly I don’t say it.  More like screech it at the top of my broken vocal chords.

Get off your brother/s! would be another oft repeated order.  Again louder than a whisper.

I think no! speaks for itself. 

Pretty much par for the course, I think you’ll agree.  This week I came out with some others.   

These are the printables!

Leave the dog alone!

Bollix!  So much so actually that now Smallest Boys says “bogg-ix” at the drop of a hat.

Stop licking the floor!  (Yes.  I said that.)

Wait!

Get out of the bathroom!

Stop swinging out of the curtains.

Get down off the roof of the van!

No!  You absolutely cannot have a bloody treat!  You don’t deserve one.  (And ten minutes later)  Here!  Take the shaggin’ ice-cream and eat it. When it’s gone, it’s gone!

Who took my scissors?  I want it back. Now!

Don’t walk on the dog!

Put your brother down!

Is that poo on the floor?  Tell me that is not poo on the floor.  Don’tletthedogeatit!

Look!  Look at those men searching for their balls!  (We were driving past a golf links at the time.)

Take your hand out of the dog’s mouth!

Don’t wake your little brother. 

Liam!  (I have lost count of the number of times I called him.  I know deafness isn’t a joke but I was this close to losing my remaining marbles)

Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease stop shouting.  I! Said! Stop! Shouting!  Do you hear me? 

Don’t touch my bag! 

Don’t run! Come back!

Don’t wee on the floor!

Leave me alone!

Don’t eat the dirt!

Don’t put that crayon up the dogs bum!  Why????  Why?????  Just don’t!!

Don’t do your wee’s on the grass!

Quick!  Wee up against the wall.  Go on!  No-one will see you!

My favourite one would have to be:  He is a girl.  She’s just dressed like a boy. May god forgive me but I was trying to get some girls in the park to let Lovely Liam into “their” tree house.  I hope he’ll forgive me.

I have also said “yes,” a lot this week, there were plenty of “of course’s,” a few “if you would like to’s,” tonnes of “I love you, too’s,” a couple of “absolutely’s,” and maybe one or two, “Do you know school starts back in 3 weeks?”

That one was probably the meanest!